So I know exactly what you are thinking, “So how does this BOUNCE FORWARD thing work!?” Well let’s get into it then. Like with most things, Bounce Forward starts with a change in mindset. The ability to not only reinvent yourself but also re-envisage a new future after failure or loss requires a very particular type of mindset. How makes up this mindset? Allow me to share my humble opinion. Bouncers are people who choose to believe that success and abundance is not only inevitable but also their right. They believe that they deserve to win; that they deserve to be happy and fulfilled. They equally understand that with that comes a need for them to grow. Bouncers understand that to ultimately inherit or accomplish their destiny, they have to be ready. And so the other thing they know is that knowing alone is not enough; they must act. They have an action based mentality. Are you a Bouncer? To find out how much Bounce you have in you, take my free Bounce Assessment on my website. That being said, there are six steps to bouncing forward, namely; become flexible, removal of obstacles, jump, take the impact, expand and push off from the point of impact. Each of these steps feeds into the other and is important in insuring that you gather momentum as you go through life’s ebbs and flows. And whether you are right at the bottom of a current loss, working your way up out of one or in a peak space and just wanting to prepare for possible future falls or failures, the six steps will serve you well. Here’s a quick introduction to each step before we go into them in more detail. Becoming flexible is one of life’s best kept secrets. In essence, this is you taking the decision to remain open to the idea that you might have to change vehicle to get to your destination. It’s you accepting that you might have to let go of ideas, things and people in order to progress. It’s also the understanding that your timelines might need readjusting but that does not mean anything was in vain. Second in the process is would be the removal of obstacles. What obstacles? Negative people, limiting beliefs, bad habits, etc… Obstacles will come in and out of our lives, businesses, relationships and careers, how long they stay there is our decision. The reason this is important is that obstacles will cost you your momentum. Be it on the way down or up. And now we jump, possibly the most important of the steps. Too many of us stand too far from the ledge of life and we don’t jump. The saddest part is that in not jumping we can never fly. And yes I know that fear (especially of failure) is a real thing and you too have your own fears but in the words of some wise man or woman once upon a time, “You can’t score if you aren’t even in the game…” We need to master the courage to act and let experience be our teacher where need be. And momentum requires motion. It need not be the biggest jump for you to gain momentum. That momentum builds up. The next step is where character is tested; take the impact. Taking the impact of loss or failure or set-backs is what most people run from. They run from the anticipated pain and I suppose they are also afraid of staying down. It’s important to take the pain because one of the things it teaches you what you can take. It introduces you to your thresholds and that will help put your future challenges into context. Taking the impact also means you are fully present for the experience; you are honest with yourself and to those around you. This allows you to start the next part, expansion. Expansion involves you summoning all that “compresses energy” in the form of spiritual, emotional, physical and intellectual strength to will yourself back up. The mat that you laid at the point of impact (friends, family, and other resources) is now called into action as the support from which you push. It’s also important to note that they would be doing you an injustice if they absorb too much of the impact when you first make contact as this will take out the momentum required to push back up. And last in the process is the actual Bounce, the rise. This happens when you push from the mat/ point of contact and leap towards your next high point. This is where everything comes together. You support structures, your lessons learnt, your internal strength and your vision are required to propel you back up. I will unpack each of these steps in the coming chapters but lets first deal with why some people won’t follow through and use this process. In my observation, there are 3 things that keep people from taking action; even when that action is in their own best interest. These are as follows: their beliefs, societal pressure and fear. I do however believe that the first two are mere manifestations of the last, fear. The truth is that what you believe about success, failure, loss or anything for that matter will determine how you act. Challenging and changing our beliefs is a necessity if we really want to realize our dreams. But because I don’t have the pleasure of being face to face with you to help you re-wire your belief system to better serve you, I will only ask one thing of you for yourself. Please make a deliberate decision to believe that failure is not a bad thing. Embrace that belief and all else will fall into place. With respect to society and how they view failure, I will challenge you to take three of the people whose opinion you fear the most. Then I want you to tell me whether these people are living their fullest, most fulfilling lives. Tell me when they last dared to be great!? The answer to this question will help you decide what to do with societal pressure. The last of the obstacles is fear. Firstly, I need you to know that it’s okay to admit fear. What I will however share with you is that scientifically fear and excitement are the same thing. What do I mean? Well biochemically, fear and excitement are the exact same thing. So why do we look at them differently? Meaning! The meaning we give to things determines whether we fear them or are excited by them. An example is in two people’s relationship with skydiving. The first timer is probably losing their mind in fear because they imagine complete and utter death as the end result. The experienced jumper is however excited because to him this jump means experiencing a freedom that humans can’t otherwise experience- flight. So I guess what I am suggesting is that you change the meaning you give to failure or falling or even daring! Lastly, I just want to remind you that you are reading this book for a reason. You picked it up because you have a reason to want to learn how to Bounce Forward. That reason might be your kids so they learn how to live a bold and full life through your example. Maybe it might be that you are tired of talking about that business that you want to start. It could be that you were hurt in love once and have yearned for a great relationship for years but you were crippled by fear. Whatever the reason, I ask that you always remember that at times. This is your WHY. And when your why is big enough and you remember it, the things that were optional in your life will go from being optional to being absolute musts! So use your WHY to make mastering the bounce forward a must. I invite you to write down three reasons why you must commit to always bouncing forward, no matter what the challenge...
